The weekend my friends made me feel like Paris Hilton.

Hello, my little tamales. Not only am I back, I am also 21! Time flies when one is walking on the road of life. Nevertheless, I am packed with pictures and ready to show 'em off. Before I begin unraveling these pictures, I must say, I felt like Paris Hilton - my birthday was celebrated every day of the weekend because my friends are that awesome.

Friday night: Small group with my lovelies. We had a tasty Mexican dinner prepared for us by the men:

Why yes, our tummies were full and gassy indeed.

Saturday: The girls and I packed ourselves into my car, with bags nestled tightly in the trunk, and headed to Orlando to spend the day and night. All to welcome my 21st year at precisely 12:00 AM. Apparently, my sneaky, yet such amazing friends had surprises in store. As seen below, I was taken to Graffiti Junktion, Improv and then we walked around the town. Oh, and notice my iPhone ownership-excitement.

  

Sunday: Possibly my favorite day. The girls and I woke up, went to the mall, then went to lay out by Lake Eola. I even had the chance to snag some great pictures. It was so amazing. Then we finished Sunday with an amazing church service (yes, our church is in Orlando).

                                      

And more can be found on my Flickr account off to the side.

Of course, I cannot forget to thank my new followers! Elizabeth, whom I personally know. David, whose posts are full of humor and sweet, Kahea. Thank you, sweets!

Bittersweet Twenty.

[Photo is taken from Flickr]

Das righ'. My birthday is cruisin' around the corner faster than you can say "candlestick" fifteen times over. Try it. I dare you. I shall post the festivities of the night once the weekend is over. Before the welcoming of my twenty first year, I have decided to list the most magnificent of things that have occurred over the past twenty years of my life.

1. My birth (I mean, really, that was a pivotal moment.)
2. My 16th birthday. It was like an MTV's "My Super Sweet 16". Except, in my living room, with Chik-Fil-A or'dourves. Oh, and one really great rendition of Gwen Stefani's song "Crash". I know. Ballin'.
3. Finding God at age 18 (comparable to birth).
4. Discovering that the act of changing someone, because I think it is necessary, is ever so impractical. It is their own push and their own willingness that will produce true change.
5. I have received the greatest of friends just this past year. They accept me through my smack talk, my poop talk, my breakdowns, my laugh attacks and just my all around madness. For the first time in my life, I can say that I have genuine friends.
6. I had a boyfriend who gave me a true outline to what a Christian relationship is. Although it did not work out, due to distance and my inability to comprehend how much he was trying to show me, I will never forget him and that experience. That relationship alone helped in the shaping of my relationship with God.
7. Becoming acutely aware that I am in love with Sushi. A big thanks to Kazu's Sushi. You ma boy.
8. I cannot forget one of the greatest moments: Going out to feed the homeless in the streets of downtown St. Petersburg and downtown Tampa. I've never seen God move so much in one day. I could go on for forever about this.
9. Being able to be apart of For the Girls International: AWAKEN Conference. I was given the opportunity to talk about how God is moving in my life in regards to impacting the community around me and my family.
10. Worship in the Woods that turned into Worship in church but with blanket forts and college kids.
11. I may be turning into a hippy. I'll check back around my 22nd birthday to give an update.
12. Actually, number 12 happened this morning. I got to work and I was on the phone, when the door opened and in walked the little girl who had spine surgery some months ago. I constantly ask her grandparents about her after work. I always see her getting off the bus in her wheelchair every day at 4PM and to see her walking today was so emotional for me. She and her sister brought me a Hostess cupcake with a candle in the middle. Talk about the best morning ever.
13. Last but not least, my becoming a youth leader at Reformation Youth Ministries, the high school ministry at my church. I never knew I could love the kids there so much. It has, figuratively, given me a new heart.

All in all, it has been a bittersweet twenty years.

Okay, now I must prepare myself for Sunday and all of its outrageous-ness (there may be rollercoasters in my near future). "Prepare" means: Get back to work at work, attend small group, make everyone eat Mexican dinner at small group -  they let a Mexican pick what dinner we should have - and then head on over to Orlando with the ladies. Have a great weekend, loves!

A Beat of Encouragement

Yesterday I received one of the nicest and one of the most encouraging messages ever.

"Just wanted to say I think it's awesome how on fire for God you are. It's very rare these days with somebody your age and it makes me smile every time you say you can see God working, because I always could too and that was the best feeling ever. You probably don't know how many lives you're affecting, we never do, but you are. It seems like you're one of God's favorite tools and that is a beautiful thing. =)"

The incredible thing about this message, though, was the fact that I've never known this guy to know God. Yet, after an extensive conversation, I found a dusty heart. I hands down believe God used him for the bit of encouragement I subconciously needed, and in return, God used his words to help me encourage him in dusting off his heart for Him. This made my heart skip a beat.

What a clever and great God I serve.

Empty brain chatter and baby leaves.

I haven't really anything new to write about lately. I suppose I should do something mall rat-like, that way my mind is opened up to awkward situations, weird occurrences, and unusual events. If I were to even slightly open to the door to my thoughts, you would read nothing but my distaste for federal government, my new found respect for poetry and my remaining dislike for math. For now, you can take part in looking at the process of the growing leaves, and how much I love the signs of Spring:

Jesus + Best friends =

These past two weekends have officially been dubbed two of the best in my span of twenty years thus far. After Worship in the "Woods", twenty-something year olds making blanket forts, a picnic at the park, tree hugging, the AWAKEN Conference, and large, red chairs with my favorite ladies, I would say that my smile continues to grow. Let's see what memories have been captured...

Worship in the "Woods":

AWAKEN 2010:

Can you see why my smile would be permanent?

Also, here is an e-thank you to my new followers:

Christene and Kendra!

You ladies are wonderful!

Solidity Rhymes With...

As written in my last post, I am in the process of plucking the thorns from body as I recover from an ever-wonderful breakup. While plucking, I have realized the value of being single and I am absorbing the solidity that it brings. I am not by any means saying that it is not hard, because it certainly is, but I have a will that has grown within me to keep me going.

I am thinking one would ask "Why would it be hard to be single?" and I would regard this as a very legitimate question. While this is embarrassing and pathetic to admit, my answer to the question is: I do not know the last time I was without a boyfriend. There. I said it. It is strange to comprehend, sad to admit, yet, funny to realize.

It is strange that I have never really understood how dependent I was on another human being for my pull to happiness. I suppose the sadness derives from my lack of dependence on God, and all of the time I have wasted in between. Then there is the funny realization. I can find humor in it now, because God still was unrelenting in every relationship. I would ask God if this is not to be, then tear it down - and He would. Nonetheless, without thought, I would continue with my way. It was as if God was acting as the bulldozer to my "relationship life" and after the mess was cleaned up, I would carry on without sending Him a thank you card. How rude of me.

Now, here I am. God has decided to do a bit of bulldozing again, and this time, I will wait. I will be patient. I will listen. I will be more willing and open to who, and more importantly, what He wants for my life. With all of this said, I will blatantly admit that I have tried to go my own way regarding my emotions, but even that did not work out. I literally had to give everything to God, and I mean everything. Once I did just that, I knew there could not possibly be a greater feeling of freedom.

I'll end by saying solidity rhymes with validity. Solidity is what I rest in and God's validity in helping me rely solely on Him is what keeps me going. I cannot wait until I can say the statement, "I do not know the last time I have had a boyfriend." and mean this.


One more thing. I would love to thank my two new followers: Julia and Crescendo! You two are lovely. Thank you!

An Unquestionable Importance

First and foremost, I would love to thank my new followers: Yesenia, Where the Hart is, Ragamuffin, Jillian McGrath, Kristi Marie, and Amy! I thank you ladies and your interest in my blog. It is always encouraging in the blogosphere world. Speaking of encouragement and women, I have been recognizing the importance of friendship and how it has been vital in my life recently.

As a 20 year old, I have experienced much heartbreak, and just recently I was thrown into the the thorn bushes of all heartbreak. While the thorns hurt, I am more than blessed and more than grateful to have the most amazing friends to help the process of plucking these little boogers out. My friends are so gentle, so kind, so helpful and most of all, so loving. I just wanted to take this time to write an entry on how amazing they really are.

Chelsea, Holly, April, Jessica, Aretha, Andrea

I love you ladies so much. I just don't know what I would do without you. I cherish you six ladies, and want to thank you for the encouragement through this gradual process of maturing myself in life and in my relationship with God. I love that you challenge me and keep helping me in my steps toward a better future. Thank you for never giving up on me. I am so happy God has placed you ladies in my life. Again, thank you.

With that, maybe we should all take the time to recognize the significance of our girl friends and to thank them. If you're one who happens to be uneasy with the idea of having girls as friends in life (I used to be the same exact way), I will be more than happy to be your first female friend. I promise to be there for you and to help you over and through whatever speed bump you encounter. I believe it is an unquestionable importance that we all have our friends to lean on when we figuratively fall into thorn bushes. After all, all we want is, as The Early November would say: "Love, love and happy afternoons" and through friendships we can find this.